Hair-raising heirloom
Tidying the stationery cupboard throws up many archaeological treasures, but nothing so exciting, or terrifying, as the discovery made by a gentleman sorting through his deceased brother鈥檚 attic in Kent the other day. He found a head.
This Egyptian mummy鈥檚 remains, brought to England as a souvenir, must have been passed down the family line for several generations. You would think it might have come up in conversation now and again. But no: the discoverer, who has gifted the grisly object to Canterbury Museums and Galleries, says he knew nothing about it. A CT scan , and more detailed research should be able to tell us much about her life, health and diet 鈥� rather less about how she ended up shrouded in family secrecy in a Kentish attic.
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Delayed justice
Little mystery attaches to the fate of Elizabeth Johnson, convicted of consorting with the devil in 1693 in Salem, Massachusetts. Johnson, though branded a witch, wasn鈥檛 executed, and maybe that is why, when the colony passed a bill in 1711 overturning the witchcraft convictions, her name got left off the list. She lived into the mid-1700s 鈥� under what cloud one can only imagine 鈥� and was buried in an unmarked grave.
Her story attracted the attention of Massachusetts teacher Carrie LaPierre and her eighth-grade civics class, and, says , inspired their campaign to get Johnson exonerated. The bill passed on 28 July. The wheels of justice ever turned slowly 鈥� but 329 years might be some sort of record.
The waiting game
On the same day, waiting of an altogether more cheerful sort was being anatomised in the . Aya Hatano and her team at Kyoto University may have staged the cheapest and simplest experiment in the history of psychology by observing groups of 259 university students waiting in a room. Their results were startling: 鈥淎cross six experiments, we consistently found that participants鈥� predicted enjoyment and engagement for the waiting task were significantly less than what they actually experienced,鈥� the team explains. Those volunteers who were permitted to access distractions stabbed away at their mobile phones 鈥� and yet emerged no happier than those left mulling their own thoughts. Vindication is sweet for Feedback, whose Nokia 8110 was last charged in 1996.
Revenge is salty
So here we are, in the stationery cupboard, without a mobile phone, thinking. In this meditative state, Feedback鈥檚 attentions are drawn ineluctably inwards. As in: are there any snacks about the place?
听
The Sun鈥檚 report on the work of Mathias Clausen and his team at the University of Southern Denmark was met with a degree of glee here. Apparently, if you marinate jellyfish in alcohol, then smother them in salt and vinegar, they come out all crunchy and tasting rather like pork scratchings. Delicious.
Tasteless beverage
And what better to wash them down with than a nice cup of condom juice? You can let go of your pearls, it isn鈥檛 what you think (but it isn鈥檛 much better). According to , a bunch of lads in Durgapur, India, have discovered that if you boil up flavoured condoms, the aromatic compounds break down to alcohol. Well, of a sort: according to the report, Dheeman Mandal at Durgapur Divisional Hospital says one of the compounds is also found in Dendrite, a glue abused by solvent sniffers. For those contemplating a pot of simmering rubbers, be advised the process also releases some very harmful toxins, of course.
Space snack
Clearly, humans will go to great lengths for an amuse-bouche, but 4.2 light years seems a very long way to go for a slice of spicy Spanish sausage.
On 31 July, 茅tienne Klein, director of France鈥檚 Alternative Energies and Atomic Energy Commission, posted a photograph of a slice of reddish-orange chorizo to Twitter with a whimsical caption claiming it to be a snap of Proxima Centauri taken by the James Webb Space Telescope.
has it , the photo garnering 19,000 likes and more than 3000 retweets in a matter of hours. Klein issued a hurried retraction: 鈥淎ccording to contemporary cosmology,鈥� he wrote, 鈥渘o object belonging to Spanish charcuterie exists anywhere but on Earth.鈥�
Just as long as we are clear the moon is made of cheese, right?
Legal bun fight
After the jellyfish crisps and stellar sausage, some coffee would be nice, if only to wash away the news from Durgapur. A cup may soon arrive free of charge, courtesy of Canadian coffee-house chain Tim Hortons, which is a class action lawsuit after customers found the company鈥檚 app had been harvesting data from their mobile phones for over a year.
The proposed settlement offers a free hot beverage and a free baked good to all eligible app users. Given the other refreshments on offer in this week鈥檚 column, Feedback is inclined to accept.
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