Dog days
Feedback is displeased. Returning from our morning constitutional, we discover the cause of the suspect pong that has been following us, in the form of a sizable patty of dog dirt attached to our shoe.
Considering our immediate instinct – to release the hounds in search of the culprit – to be counterproductive, we turn to forensic science. is a US company that offers a “DNA solution for dog waste”. It promises to get on the scent of dog owners who don’t clean up after their pets by matching poo to pooch.
There is a catch: all suspects need to be in a doggie DNA database. This is mostly workable for pets in apartment and housing complexes, where a management company can request all dogs on the property be registered. (The company suggests kicking off with a “Dog Day” to “make swabbing fun” in order to collect the necessary genetic data.)
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Feedback is conflicted. Do we risk dog-walking into a surveillance state here? Not answered, for example, is just how long a dog’s DNA will be kept on file when it hasn’t been charged with a crime. Should privacy campaigners be up in arms – or legs even – demanding due canine process?
Don’t say: “Roll over.” Do say: “Who’s a good boy, until proven otherwise by a jury of his peers?”
Brown gold
Talking of matters scatological, for those of you seeking a $200 jar of horse manure from 1997 Kentucky Derby winner Silver Charm, this is your lucky day. US artist Coleman Larkin is offering that and more in his series of “Dixieland Preserves”, nuggets of thoroughbred dung lovingly immortalised in epoxy resin in mason jars.
You might never be able to own a racehorse, but at least you can admire the fortitude of its digestive system with one of these handsome collectibles, the perfect dinner-party conversation starter. Profits from the sale of the preserves will go towards Old Friends Farm in Georgetown, Kentucky, a facility for retired racehorses. “The most difficult step,” , “is probably the one where I have to ask the type of people that own million-dollar thoroughbreds if I can please have some horse turds to put in jars.”
That, and assuring would-be purchasers of the turds’ elevated origin, rather than being something that Feedback just wiped off our shoe. One for the DNA testers?
A view to die for
For those uncompromising in their pursuit of the perfect Instagram moment, a cautionary tale from Hawaii. A US man has survived falling 21 metres into the caldera of Kilauea, the most active of the five volcanoes on the state’s biggest island, .
Were the name of the location – Steaming Bluff – not warning enough, Kilauea spent much of last year destroying homes and forcing the evacuation of thousands of people. With saintly patience, park authorities reminded the public that guard rails cordoning off the unstable lip of one of the world’s most active volcanoes are there for a reason.
Not a stool pigeon
A PARROT has been taken into police custody in Brazil – but he isn’t squawking. The unnamed bird is accused of acting as a lookout for a pair of local drug dealers. The parrot shrieked, “Mum, the police!” as narcotics officers closed in on their den during a raid. After refusing to say a word to the authorities while in detention, the parrot has been passed to a local zoo, presumably to swagger around the exercise yard in an orange jumpsuit, plotting its next move.
Water way to live
The English county of Suffolk is generally thought of as a quiet, bucolic sort of place. Its popularity as a weekend bolthole for wealthy Londoners might have something to do with evidence that has emerged of a never-ending drug-fuelled party going on beneath its surface, among its freshwater shrimp.
A study published in Environment International found that specimens of the amphipod Gammarus pulex fished from the county’s waters , ketamine, MDMA, tramadol and much more. Proof positive that drugs don’t just affect you, but all those around you. Perhaps this could be the basis for a new anti-drug campaign. “Choose pond life”, Feedback suggests, or maybe “Just say newt”.
A hard shell
Talking of pond life: reader Gavan Schneider spies “turtle cookies” in a canteen in Wentworth Falls, west of Sydney. These are, the label assures him, “gluten & vegan free”.
Simply offal
And while we are on the subject of cannibalism, doctors in Canada are asking women to please stop eating human placentas, often freeze-dried and put into pills. The practice has been praised by celebrities such as Kim Kardashian, Chrissy Teigen and January Jones, hailed as a tonic that replaces iron and lifts mood.
But a review by the Society of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists of Canada – while coming with a significant risk of food poisoning if the organ isn’t appropriately prepared.
For those convinced that bodily recycling is good for you and the planet, Feedback suggests some less problematic alternatives. Chew your nails to reclaim zinc that would otherwise go in the bin. Bottle your sweat to top up on essential salts. You get the idea.
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