Bad moon rising
AS WE recover from our close encounter with the moon after it skimmed a dizzying 356,511 kilometres from Earth – the closest pass since 1948 – we turn our attention to the after-effects of this celestial event. At wine-buff bible , brows were furrowed over the important question: what could the supermoon do to wine?
The answer is, for most of the world, absolutely nothing, of course. But there are some vineyards bracing themselves for an effect: those run as “biodynamic” farms, where organic practices merge with the occult.
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As a biodynamic wine consultant – a role we presume is as a sort of astrologer for grapes – Monty Waldin thinks that the closer-than-average moon could bring a “winter mood” to the vines, making the wines taste less fruity. But the brighter-than-average moon could also bring a “summer mood” to the vines, he says, making the wines taste more fruity.
So your wine will be less fruity, more fruity – or possibly the change will be indistinguishable. A dramatic effect for a moon that was only 0.38 per cent closer than .
“Pat Collins asks: “Have you encountered the Director of Science and Technology for Employer Solutions at Quest Diagnostics, a drug testing firm, named Dr Barry Sample?””
Light meal
MEANWHILE, Brian King is concerned that current dining trends might leave him hungry for more, and not in a good way.
At a recent trip to a restaurant, he was offered “bunless meat free burgers”. Just the dressing, perhaps? “The restaurant also offered doughnut holes,” says Brian, “which obviously have no fat, sugar, other carbohydrates or anything else.” At least they’re safe from the supermoon though.
Bot bruiser
REPORTS of a robot on the rampage in China. A domestic droid named Fatty crashed out of its booth and through a glass panel at the China Hi-Tech Fair in Shenzhen, injuring a bystander.
An official statement from organisers pinned the blame on a robot operator, who “mistakenly hit the forward button, instead of the reverse one”.
Can robots invoke the Nuremberg defence of “only following orders”? Or does the Second Law of Robotics already forbid following orders that would cause harm to humans? Feedback expects we’ll soon field cold calls from law firms asking if we’ve been in an accident with a robot.
Poking fun at
BAN this sick filth! Having bided its time for almost a century, the Scottish Medical Journal launches a broadside against violence in early-20th-century cinema with “Eye trauma in Laurel and Hardy movies – another nice mess”, which “examines the occurrence of eye trauma in Laurel and Hardy movies and discusses the impact they could have… had if the films were set in “.
Popcorn in hand, the researchers binge-watched 92 Laurel and Hardy movies, tallying 88 incidences of ocular trauma (and therefore, we suspect, at least four disappointingly eyeball-friendly movies).
Hardy was the recipient of 48 per cent of eye traumas, most frequently an eye poke in which “traumatic corneal abrasion was very likely the most frequently occurring injury”. Jabbing fingers were assisted in their work by “a stick, a champagne cork, a tree branch and tacks”.
The authors warn gravely that “if their films had been reality, especially Hardy but also Laurel and several other people, would have suffered from serious eye injuries”.
While we wait to hear back from the British Board of Film Classification on whether the movies will be slapped with an 18 certificate in light of this research, we think these medics make for good optometrists but lousy cinema buddies.
Ocean deep, mountain high
OUR abortive efforts to find the body of water responsible for Himalayan pink sea salt has left some readers feeling left high and dry (5 November).
Tom Brock asks “isn’t all salt sea salt?”, to which we reply, no, the kind on dry land is rock salt. But, as Barry Cash points out: “It’s likely the salt was formed from an ancient sea; if so at what point does it cease to be sea salt?” Perhaps a geologist can help.
Season to be jolly
MORE than a pinch of salt might be called for when visiting California’s , “a natural way to enhance overall physical and mental health”.
Michael Littlewood tells us this is not a cave but a spa clad with the celebrated Himalayan seasoning. On offer are salt-infused yoga, salty meditation, services to rub negative ions – that is, salt – into your skin, and the chance to relax in the “zero-gravity” deckchairs that find themselves erected regularly in Feedback’s inbox – or better still, “lie directly in the salt”.
If you can’t make it to Santa Barbara, Feedback recommends clambering into a roadside hopper where the local authority keeps its road grit, for a low-budget salt-infused isolation chamber experience.
Alt command
PREVIOUSLY, Feedback noted attempts by Brian Reffin Smith to download an assembly guide from the IKEA website, only to be told “this page is under construction” (19 November). Chris Williams thinks that “perhaps Brian needs a computer keyboard with an Allen key”.