Quantum shift in woo-woo nonsense
FEEDBACK’S “ongoing nonsensewatch programme”, as Ian Sanderson dubs it, is grateful to him for drawing our attention to and its promise of an “algorithmic technology” to combat ageing. We knew that students of what in the old days we called “New Age babble” are guaranteed a feast of material, as soon as we read the heading: ““.
“Trinfinity8™,” we are told, “represents a new quantum shift in the emerging science of algorithmic rejuvenation technology.” Would that be a means of sprucing up tired computer routines? Not at all: “This unique software program was developed as a direct result of information brought back from a near-death experience by Dr. Kathy Forti. Trinfinity8 is the first system of its kind to use a personal computer to deliver non-invasive rejuvenation programs based on mathematical codes, vibrational energies, and fractal formulations that are in harmony with core energetics that encompass all of nature.”
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So far, so complete a catalogue of fruitloopery. But how might it work, then? “Trinfinity8 leads the way in using pure quartz crystal rods to directly deliver information to the body in a language it understands – math.” It does?
The “math” appears, from the sample we could bear to read before our brain announced it was frying, to consist of practically every piece of woo-woo nonsense known, and some new ones too. For Trinfinity8 offers you “A Quantum Interface to Magnify User Intent; Mathematical Binary Substance Coding; A Fractal Amplification Resonator; Sacred Geometry Infusion; Pure Solfeggio Sound Tones & Harmonic Crystal Tuning; and Rapid Quartz Crystal Rod Transmission.”
But, once more, with feeling – what are we being sold? “Trinfinity8’s unique technology allows for streams of coded data to be transmitted through your computer’s USB port. A digital translator device then sends information to the body via specially designed hand-held quartz crystal transmitter/receiver rods.” There is also “a uniquely designed fractal resonator that displays a gallery of beautiful geometric animations during different programs”.
Adding it all up, that’ll be some sounds, some pictures and some crystals – for $8000. Any takers?
“Last month, Telstra’s Bigpond news website announced: “.” Ian Cutter wonders just how close you can get if you really try”
All submissions will be rejected
FEEDBACK is always glad to hear about scientific journals that cover new ground, even when, as is the case with this one, they turn out to have been around for a couple of years. The Journal of Universal Rejection fills a long-standing gap in science publication, as can be seen by the description on its website: “The founding principle of the Journal of Universal Rejection (JofUR) is rejection. Universal rejection. That is to say, all submissions, regardless of quality, will be rejected.”
The statement then outlines the advantages of submitting to the JofUR. First and foremost: “You can send your manuscript here without suffering waves of anxiety regarding the eventual fate of your submission. You know with 100 per cent certainty that it will not be accepted for publication.”
The journal’s website goes on to name its editorial board, followed by its “Instructions for authors”. These tell us: “The JofUR solicits any and all types of manuscript: poetry, prose, visual art, and research articles. You name it, we take it, and reject it. Your manuscript may be formatted however you wish. Frankly, we don’t care.”
The website at concludes with the journal’s archive, starting in March 2009 (vol 1, no 1) and continuing to the present day. The contents of each issue are described as “empty”.
THE UK’s recent severe winter weather seemed less surprising to Bob Earl when he read a on the BBC Norfolk website. It told him: “The last Ice Age in Britain took place around 10,000 years ago and lasted for some 80,000 years.”
The feature in question was last updated in April 2008, so this statement has gone uncorrected for at least two years. Perhaps Bob is the first person to have read it.
ENGAGED in a school project to measure her dog’s IQ, Freya Skipworth was taken aback by the information on the Science Buddies “project ideas” site. In the section on , Freya was told: “This test can show how well the dog understands spatial relationships between objects, especially horizontal objects. Dogs that move about more in 3 dimensions should do better at this than those that move only on the ground.”
Could anyone who knows more than we do about the physics of canine behaviour tell us what this means?
FINALLY, alarming product claim of the week: Arthur Lindley bought a litre of to rid his poultry house of the red mite parasite. A message on the container warned him that it “Eliminates all organic matter including parasites such as red mite.” Arthur is worried. Won’t it also eliminate his wooden poultry house?
