尝翱狈顿翱狈鈥橲 Millennium Bridge is not the only structure in the world with a
tendency to wobble (快猫短视频, 31 March, p 38). Reader Chris Knibbs
encountered the same problem when he built a perch for his chickens.
He wanted it to be 鈥渞ealistic鈥, like a tree branch, so he suspended a short
pole on wires that could sway slightly. Unfortunately, even a minor swing would
set the birds leaning forwards and back in unison to counter the sway of the
perch. This made the perch sway more. So the chickens rocked further and
faster.
鈥淚 would be woken by the sound of loud creaking noises from the chicken shed.
In the dead of night鈥攂y torchlight鈥 there they would be, swaying
back and forth on their Millennial chicken swing,鈥 says Knibbs.
Advertisement
After about a fortnight, however, the chickens seemed to adapt. Any
swinging鈥攗sually caused by a new bird jumping up onto the pole鈥攚ould
subside fairly quickly until all was still in the hen shed once more.
What can the Millennium Bridge engineers learn from this?
A COUPLE of weeks ago we reported on Microsoft鈥檚 鈥淣T technology鈥, which we
wrongly assumed meant 鈥淣ew Technology technology鈥. Our thanks to reader Iain
Broadfoot, who points out that it actually means 鈥淣orthern Telecom technology鈥,
after the people who originally developed it.
But that hasn鈥檛 stopped reader Ernest Ager sending a string of examples of
what must henceforth be known as RAS syndrome鈥攚here 鈥淩AS鈥 stands for
鈥渞edundant acronym鈥︹濃攜es, you鈥檝e guessed the rest.
For example, we advise readers against making clever-clever responses to
police who demand to see their ID document. Otherwise they may find themselves
looking down the wrong end of an SLR rifle (self-loading, that is).
Less dangerously, many of you have to deal daily with LIMS systems
(laboratory information management. . .) and some may have been prescribed HRT
therapy (hormone replacement. . .).
In the air, Agar notices HUD displays (head-up鈥) and under water, scraping
the bottom of what looks like being a large barrel, SCUBA apparatus
(self-contained underwater breathing鈥).
Is this the last we will be hearing of RAS syndrome? We suspect not.
OUR PLEA about the letter from the Post Office addressed to a person who鈥檇
moved, with instructions that under no circumstances should it be forwarded (24
March), elicited three suggestions from Debbie Moorhouse.
One: take the letter to your local post office, explain the situation and let
them sort it out. 鈥淭here is,鈥 she notes, 鈥渢he danger with this method that it
will nonetheless mysteriously reappear in your letter box.鈥
Two: put the letter in another envelope and address it exactly as the first
envelope, but omit the injunction not to redirect it.
The third solution is probably illegal and involves the round filing cabinet
next to Feedback鈥檚 desk.
But as several other readers have also pointed out, such letters are
necessitated by humans鈥 bad behaviour. The 鈥渘ot to be redirected鈥 letter is sent
to the person who has requested redirection to give them an opportunity to deny
they did so鈥攊n case a fraudster has made the request on their behalf in
order to get sent all their mail. Moorhouse explains: 鈥淥bviously, therefore, it
mustn鈥檛 be redirected, as, if a fraudster is involved, that would defeat the
object of sending it in the first place.鈥
Simple, really.
READER Rachel Cave was thrilled to receive the programme for the British
Association鈥檚 Science Week last month. She was more thrilled to find that it
bore an introduction from the science minister, Lord Sainsbury. And yet more
thrilled to read that: 鈥淢ore scientific discoveries have been made in the past
ten years than in the whole of human history.鈥
But she鈥檚 also puzzled. On what planet, she wonders, has the noble lord been
studying the history of science? On this one, however you measure a discovery,
the statement seems extremely unlikely.
Some quick surfing, though, may give an insight into the ministerial
misunderstanding. Of 2,784,014 US patents listed in the online Delphion
database, for example, 1,348,489 were granted since January 1991. Could it just
be that Lord Sainsbury is confusing a patent with a scientific discovery?
AND when we visited the BA Science Week website to search for references to
鈥淪ainsbury鈥, we were rewarded with a very elegant page declaring 鈥淪uccess鈥. And
absolutely nothing else. Is there a hidden message in this non-message?
IF the tabloid press is to be believed, the foot and mouth crisis may be even
more serious than we thought. The Sun reported on 15 March that: 鈥淎ny
country around the world might be contaminated. This virus is strong and very
颈苍迟别濒濒颈驳别苍迟.鈥
Horrifying stuff. But rethinking the entire biological basis of intelligence
might be premature. The quote was attributed to 鈥淯N food expert Yves Cheneau鈥
who is in fact head of the Food and Agriculture Organization鈥檚 Animal Health
Service, based in Paris. Perhaps his statement gained something in the
translation from the French.
THE BOTTLE of Walden Farms Fat Free Balsamic Vinaigrette proudly announces:
鈥淢ade with real ingredients.鈥 This, presumably, is so that we don鈥檛 confuse it
with other brands that use imaginary ingredients
FINALLY, here鈥檚 one of those research paper titles that you find yourself
rereading just to make sure your attention hasn鈥檛 wandered off halfway through.
A recent issue of Micron included this: 鈥淪canning electron microscopy
and X-ray diffraction studies in the analysis of medical materials: Gore-tex
versus braided polyester tape for repair of the incompetent cervix.鈥 Got
that?